The complicated pillow

Yes, a pillow can be complicated. No, not like setting up a ftp site or programming a vcr kind of complicated. No, I'm talking about a level of complication that is far outside the realm for a typical pillow. A pillow should be soft and firm with no buttons or zippers. A pillow-case is acceptable, but not required. The fabric of the pillow (or pillow case) should be soft and smooth, but not slippery (thus silk is out). The one in question has several buttons that run down the middle of one side, course fabric, a large border edge of the same material, and no function other than to cause me severe frustration whenever I am stuck with the argonous duty of putting the God-forsaken thing back together after my wife has washed it. So you might ask, What has this pillow ever done to me? It's not its fault it's complicated. It's only doing what it was designed to do; lay ontop of the the other pillows and match the comforter cover (which, in itself has a level of complication I'd rather not think about). Well, I do dislike this pillow. I don't like the fabric, I absolutely hate the buttons, and the large border edge...well, it just drives me nuts. And don't think I haven't given it its far shake. I have...on a number of occassions. The pillow that is inside this case is actually quite nice, but alas, it's outter shell was spawned in the ninth level of hell. It's course and anything but soft and worse yet, it leaves you with the worst head-lines if you sleep on it! Arrrgh!
Now, as a married man and one that doesn't take for granted the things my wife does around the house I shall not ever imply that she get rid of these pilllows. By no means! They match the decore of the room perfectly. But now I really must address the pillow count issue. I need three pillows for proper rest. One behind my back, on under my head, and one to hold onto and smother like a security blanket. And the complicated pillow will not be allowed to fill any one of those applications. I demand a supplimental pillow to be made available to me each evening. And in the meantime I will anex one of yours. hehe